Forgiveness comes spontaneously. It’s a quality an individual is born with. Agreed, any quality can be cultivated with the passage of time, but humane qualities cannot be developed in a vacuous heart. It needs oceanic compassion to forgive someone for his transgression. Only by forgiving do we give a person yet another opportunity to redeem him or herself.
It’s very easy to send a man behind bars, but correspondingly difficult to forgive him. Why shouldn’t he get a proper punishment? After all, he deserves it. It’s what we lesser mortals think. But punishment leaves a permanent scar. An act of forgiveness alters the heart. You embarrass an offender more by forgiving him than by punishing.
Punishment has a sadistic and sardonic streak. It degrades the culprit and also demeans all those, involved in punishing him. Gandhi, Nelson Mandela and Martin Luther King Jr became great because they could forgive.
Gandhi bore no ill-will against the English and said that once they left, they must leave like friends and not as enemies. “So long enmity rankles in heart to grow / the fountain of love will not start to flow.”
Remember, no offence is so great that it cannot be pardoned. Almost every human being in his limited span of life lives and keeps nurturing those perceived wounds and scars he thinks he’s got from the people around him. Do we ever pause and think that we too have hurt many a person? Yet, if we deserve to be pardoned, why can’t others have the same privilege?
When we forgive, we not only free the wrongdoer but also emancipate ourselves from the unbearable pressure of nagging and niggling ill feeling. Forgiveness is the greatest act of spirituality – its all-encompassing compassion. Follow it, though I myself have not been able to imbibe its spirit comprehensively.
It’s filled with very best tips and techniques for powerful manifesting and attracting unlimited abundance, so make sure you see it before it’s too late.
Top 10 Affirmations:
- I am successful in everything I do
- My life is filled with abundance
- Every cell in my body vibrates with positive energy
- I am worthy of love
- I easily manifest my dreams
- I am calm and relaxed in every situation
- Money flows freely and abundantly into my life
- My potential is limitless
- My heart is a magnet that attracts more of everything I desire
- I radiate love and happiness every single day
Quick tip: At the end of reading these affirmations, I always say ‘I choose to create all of this or something better’ to attract even more than my
imagination allows me to see right now!
So I hope you enjoyed reading them I challenge you to say some out loud today and see how great it makes you feel.
One day I hopped in a taxi and we took off for the airport. We were driving in the right lane when suddenly a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us.
My taxi driver slammed on his brakes, skidded, and missed the other car by just inches!
The driver of the other car whipped his head around and started yelling at us!
My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. And I mean, really friendly. So I asked, “Why did you just do that? This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital!”
This is when my taxi driver taught me what I now call, “The Law of the Garbage Truck.”
He explained that many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage (frustration, anger, and disappointment, etc.). As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it and sometimes they’ll dump it on you.
Don’t take it personally. Just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. Don’t take their garbage and spread it to other people at work, at home, or on the streets.
Bottom line: Successful people do not let garbage trucks take over their day.
Two prime ministers are sitting in a room discussing affairs of state. Suddenly a man bursts in, apoplectic with fury, shouting and stamping and banging his fist on the desk. The resident prime minister admonishes him: “Peter,” he says, “kindly remember Rule Number 6,” whereupon Peter is instantly restored to complete calm, apologizes, and withdraws.
The politicians return to their conversation, only to be interrupted yet again twenty minutes later by a hysterical woman gesticulating wildly, her hair flying. Again the intruder is greeted with the words: “Marie, please remember Rule Number 6.” Complete calm descends once more, and she too withdraws with a bow and an apology.
When the scene is repeated for the third time, the visiting prime minister addresses his colleague: “My dear friend, I’ve seen many things in my life, but never anything as remarkable as this. Would you be willing to share with me the secret of Rule Number 6?” “Very simple,” replies the resident prime minister. “Rule Number 6 is ‘Don’t take yourself so damn seriously’.” “Ah,” says his visitor, “that is a fine rule.” After a moment of pondering, he inquires, “And what, may I ask, are the other rules?”
“There aren’t any!”
This story helped me connect that so much of our daily stress is related to taking ourselves too seriously.
We live in a culture with extremely high expectations, intense timelines and powerful pressure. Rule Number 6 is a reminder that to truly succeed in these circumstances, both personally and professionally, we need to lighten up!
How can it be applied to us:
Remembering Rule Number 6 has become a checkpoint when I find myself stressed. Recently I was preparing for an important presentation and running into significant obstacles. Rule Number 6 helped me see that the energy I was spending worrying about how my presentation would be received and what others would think would be better applied to persistently tackling my obstacles. That reminder got me back on track and helped me avoid unnecessary drama and self-criticism.<
When calamity strikes, we react emotionally and give way to self-pity. This brings haunting fears which pervade thought and action. It poisons the wellsprings of present joy and future happiness. It is a destructive emotion. It parches your outlook, paralyses your capabilities, puts off your accomplishments, prohibits excellence and prevents growth.
Losing part of her leg in an accident at the peak of her dancing career couldn’t hold back actress and dancer Sudha Chandran’s determination and passion for dancing. After the amputation of her right leg, she got a prosthetic Jaipur foot; she started dancing again and performed on stage. This bagged her chance to act and depict her own real-life story in the movies — Mayuri in Telegu and the Hindi version of it Naache Mayuri. She is a dazzling example of a winning spirit against adverse situations.
Change your thinking. T.A. Williams says, “To rectify the distortions which fear creates, introspection is absolutely essential.” Think right and you will find a way out. It is not what befalls you that matters but how you react to it. There are millions of people who have gone under the steamroller of fate. But there are others who, despite repeated blows, have stuck to their guns. They have mastered the art of rolling with the blows. They stagger but they do get up. Learn from them.
Healthy thinking does not kill anyone. It is anxiety which does that. It is not the movement that destroys the machine, it is the friction. Why do depressing and anxious thoughts come back again and again? The reason is that we have locked them into our minds. We also do not purge our memory of the unsavory experiences of the past.
The burdens of anxiety are, in fact, skeletons which tumble out of the memory cupboard at the press of an invisible magic button. If you suffer from this syndrome, shed the notion that you are the victim of circumstances. You are the centre of your own equilibrium. Failure to realize it makes you as ineffective and without will as the weathervane which is swayed by the slightest wind. Tell yourself, “I am not the flotsam and jetsam of ideas. I am the product of my own sculpting.” Look at the lives of those who, despite the heaviest odds and physical handicaps, have achieved success. They have converted regrets into rewards.
Louis Pasteur’s work was accomplished under the most heartbreaking circumstances. At the age of 46 he had suffered a paralytic stroke which handicapped him for the rest of his life. Yet, he achieved a titanic success.
Charles Darwin was plagued by ill-health all his life. He had never known a single day of perfect health. Look at the prodigious volumes of work he produced. “While man sits on the cushions of advantages, he goes to sleep. When pushed, tormented, defeated, he has the chance to learn something. He has been put to his wits, on his manhood, he has gained facts, learnt about his ignorance, it cured the insanity of conceit, has got moderation and real skill,” Emerson said.
Santon Kirkham, who wrote a great book, Shut In while he was confined to bed for more than 26 years says, “As the most barren regions of earth yield something to the botanist and geologist, the most desolate aspects of life are not wholly without interest to the philosopher.”
Beethoven suffered from deafness. He could not hear the melodies he composed. He says in exasperation, “If I were only rid of this affliction, I would embrace the world. No I cannot endure it, I will seize fate by the throat.”
Those who successfully surmount handicaps seize them by the throat. So can you.
Traumatic experiences, failure at work, unsuccessful relationships, insecurities, inferiority complexes, tend to haunt one throughout life, sometimes assuming proportions of a devastating nature.
You find your fingers pulling at your hair. You find yourself pacing up and down your room like a caged animal. You are in a foul mood. You are haunted by a vague feeling of impending doom. Such things happen to all of us. Only situations differ and so does the intensity of the reaction.
10 helpful hints
- When you torment yourself with imaginary fears, reverses and setbacks, you write your epitaph.
- Move on. Don’t yield to self-pity. Acting like a victim threatens your future happiness.
- Eliminate the negative with two simple resolves: ‘I can’ and ‘I will’.
- You carry your worst enemy within yourself. Defeat it.
- Those who live in mental cocoons seldom grow to their full potential.
- Dwell not on gloom. Give up crippling thoughts. Replace them with cheerful ones.
- Your shadow looks menacing when it precedes you, but means nothing when it follows you.
- Self-pity is emotional poison. Purge your thinking of it.
- Don’t think that other people will be as sorry for you as you are for yourself. They may laugh at you.
- Don’t think it is somebody else’s job to get you out of your mess. Do it yourself.
Here is a list of 35 ways of creating and cultivating lasting friendships.
1.Know yourself. In order to make friends, we need to know who we are. You may want to check out this article and work out what is special about you. If you are not clear on what your life purpose is, these questions will help you.
2. Check whether you really want to have friends. If you’re secretly afraid of people, or don’t trust other, you will find it difficult to make friends.
3. Spend time around people. You can’t find friends in the cupboard.
4. Be kind. Look at what you can do for other to make their life easier.
5. Be steady and dependable. Be a friend one can count on.
6. Be genuine. Don’t try and be someone you’re not. Friendship is built on honesty.
7. Join groups and pursue activities that you enjoy. You are more likely to find friends who have common interests.
8. When travelling, talk to everyone you meet. This advice was given to me by my son Sebastian and I’ve made wonderful friendships following it.
9. Become a volunteer. You’ll find people who have a similar set of values which is a great basis for a friendship.
10. Talk to people. You’ll spend a lot of time in groups without making friends if you don’t talk with people.
11. Make eye contact and smile when you communicate people.
12. Be positive. If you only talk negatively about yourself, others, or life in general, people will not enjoy your company.
13. Remember names. If you find that difficult, ask the person again until you’ve really got it.
14. Initiate a get-together. If you meet someone you like, ask them out for a coffee or arrange another meeting. An easy way to do that is to say something like: A good way to extend yourself is to say: "Well, I’ve got to go, but if you ever want to talk over lunch or coffee or anything like that, let me give you my number/e-mail address."
15. Find common interests. Ask how he or she pursues their interest. Are they a member of a club or society? Express an interest in joining.
16. Tell your friend that you enjoy their company. Many friendships are lost because neither person finds the courage to express their interest.
17. Beware of sexual flings with friend. Many friendships don’t survive it.
18. Be glad for your friends successes. Be the only person they can tell how well they’re doing.
19. Don’t compromise your values. Keep you standards of morality and behaviour and don’t change them just to fit in with friend or a group.
20. Don’t gossip. If a new friend hears you revealing personal stories of others, he or she will be wary of your discretion.
21. Ask the other person open-ended questions about their life. Open-ended questions are ones that can’t be answered by saying ‘yes’, or ‘no’.
22. Share more deeply with a friend. Let them know what your life feels like. This is key difference between a friend and an acquaintance.
23. Keep the sharing equal. Don’t hog the time with your problems.
24. Have even roles in the relationship. If you notice that you are always the listener and she the star.
25. Switch roles regularly in your friendships. If there is one who always calls the shots, the friendship won’t last.
26. Listen to your friend. Listening is the number one glue of friendships.
27. Keep confidences. Nothing kills a budding friendship faster than spilled secrets.
28. Allow your friend to help you. Give and take has to be balanced in a friendship.
29. Share the bad times. Help your friend when things go bad. Allow your friends to help you when times are difficult.
30. Keep contact. Check in regularly with your friend. A short text message, email or phone call keeps a friendship alive.
31. Don’t crowd your friend. Make sure you don’t overwhelm — or even stalk — him or her.
32. Share bonding activities. Have some adventures together and play together. To foster long-lasting friendships, create common memories.
33. Keep talking through difficult times. Don’t let disagreements fester.
34. If there is a rift, apologize for the hurt you caused. It’s more important to keep your friendship going than to be ‘right’.
35. If a friendship is damaging your life or your family relationships, you may need to let it go. This can be a difficult decision. Weigh up how important this friendship is for you against the disturbance it brings into your life.
Source/Courtesy: posted by Mary Jaksch on ibnlive
Here are the rules and then on to the random fun!
- Link to the person who tagged you
- Post the rules to your blog
- Write 4 random things about yourself.
- Tag 2-5 people at the end of your post and link to them
- Let each person you have tagged know by leaving a comment on their blog.
- Let the tagger know when your entry is posted.
Sadly the person who tagged me does not have a blog that I can link to
This has to be on the top of the list. I hate formal clothes. For some reason, I feel very awkward in it, that like a girl I would constantly check myself to make sure its all ok
I do not get angry that easily. Only when something goes real wrong or someone pisses me off very much, that I show my anger. But I just shout at them or walk away from the spot and vent out the rage on my mobile phone or anything that’s close by .
one of my favorite things to do is spend time in a coffee shop or sit in the beach watching the waves/sunset – either alone or with a friend. But off late I have been spending far more time alone . Either people don’t want to come out or I have only a few friends who have been bugged and annoyed a lot by me .
I am a very simple person with simple thoughts and a no nonsense approach to life .
2 people I am going to tag are
One of the things that I strongly believe is, in order to understand the world better I must first understand myself. There are a lot of times when I have questioned myself as to why I am certain things and why I am not doing others. It is easy for me to ignore all these and just shrug my shoulders and say “this is what I am” – an unstable brat who does not know what he is doing.
The fact is whatever I have done so far is not out of instinct or out of arrogance (whatever you want to call it). Any thing I have done is only after thinking about it and only, I repeat, only when my heart says yes to it.
Human mind is like a monkey. It can jump anytime, anywhere without any control. That’s why I do not trust my mind and instead trust what my heart says . It might sound a bit strange, but the fact is the shortest way to happiness is doing what your heart wants you to do rather than allowing the mind.
Generally speaking, for most people it will make much more sense to lead from their mind in their business lives. This is primarily because the priorities of most businesses (maximizing profits, niche marketing, strategic planning, etc.) are best accomplished from strategies that are developed from your mind.
On the other hand, leading from your heart will make your life more peaceful and fulfilling. Generally speaking, it is the superior choice for your personal life if things like peace, purpose, fulfillment, and inspiration are important to you.
Money is required to lead a life. But so far I have never run behind it nor allowed it take “control” of my life. What I have is sufficient for my life style. Once I let my mind take control, sadly everything else takes a back seat – relationships, health, social life etc.. etc… I get turned into a machine out to achieve a certain goal and it means losing a lot of other things. In my quest to earn more and more, I would simply forget to live and repent for it at a later point in life when it is of no use trying to live again.
The great thing about listening to my heart is I never have to fight my emotions. Instead I embrace the very emotions that define me as an individual. If something feels right, I go ahead and do it else I do not . In this way, there is no second thought on what I have done is right or wrong, simply because my heart knows what is right for me in any moment based on my emotional needs, body needs etc… Ofcourse, this means I live a simple life where happiness, peace and love means a lot to me than money. If you have not figured it out, I listen to my heart .
Ofcourse there are times when the heart is wrong and the mind is right. But ultimately it all boils down to one single thing – when to listen to the heart and when to listen to the mind. Once you figure this out, life will be very simple.
When I started to write this one, I remembered this story of “The Businessman and the Fisherman”.
What do you really hope to achieve in life? Read this story and you may find what you are always hoping to achieve, you may be already having it.
There was once an American businessman who was sitting by the beach in a small Mexican village. As he sat, he saw a Mexican fisherman rowing a small boat towards the shore and noticed that the fisherman has caught quite a number of big fishes that is known to be a delicacy. The American was really impressed and asked the fisherman, “How long does it take you to catch so many fishes?”
The fisherman replied, “Oh, just a short while.”
“Then why don’t you stay longer at sea and you could catch even more?” The businessman was astonished.
The fisherman simply does not agree. “This is enough to feed my whole family,” he says.
The businessman then asked, “So, what do you do for the rest of the day then?”
The fisherman replied, “Well, I usually wake up early in the morning, go out to sea and catch a few fishes, then I would go back and play with my kids. In the afternoon, I will take a nap with my wife, and evening comes, I will join my buddies in the village for a drink, we play guitar, sing and dance throughout the night. My days are ever so complete and carefree.”
The businessman does not agree with his way of life and offered a suggestion to the fisherman.
“I am a PhD holder graduated from Harvard University, specializing in business management. I could help you to become a more successful person. From now on, you have to spend more time at sea and try to catch as many fishes as possible. And when you have saved enough money, you could buy a bigger boat and catch even more fishes. As you go on, you will be able to afford to buy more boats, recruit more fishermen and lead a team of your own. Soon you will be able to set up your own company, your very own production plant for canned food and do direct selling to your distributors. At that time, you will have moved out of this village and to Mexico City, and then expand your operation to LA, and finally to New York City, where you can set up your HQ to manage all your other branches.”
The fisherman asks, “So, how long would that take?”
The businessman reply, “About 15 to 20 years.”
The fisherman continues, “And after that?”
The businessman laughs heartily, “After that, you can live like a king in your own house, and when the time is right, you can go public and float your shares in the Stock Exchange, by then you will be rich, your income will be coming in by the millions!”
The fisherman asks, “And after that?”
The businessman says, “After that, you can finally retire, you can move to a house by the fishing village, wake up early in the morning and catch a few fishes, then return home to play with kids, have a nice afternoon nap with your wife, and when evening comes, you can join your buddies for a drink, play the guitar, sing and dance throughout the night!”
The fisherman was puzzled, “Isn’t that what I am doing now?”
So, what does one really hope to achieve in life? Do we really need to work so hard in life? What do you hope to accomplish in the end?