General
pthere is a sudden emptiness that i feel all around me. And the more i try to understand the reasons behind it, the less that i am able to concentrate on writing. At the same time, i am unable to use this as an inspiration for writing new poems too. I am hoping it does not stay for long. I have plenty to write about – emotions, especially anger suppressed inside and waiting to come out. Plus couple of events that i am trying to get them out in decent words.
watch this space or keep an eye out in a poetry of life.
A lot of things happened during the time i was away from here. Most notably, i came face-to-face with the reality that i am the master of my own fortune, which initially was pretty scary. Scary simply because just like everyone else the comfort of the paycheck coming in every month was a soothing factor.
But now the same is not going to happen. I would have to earn my livelihood. And frankly i am no magician nor i am someone with so much contacts that all my ideas would immediately be sponsored by someone else.
Till date, whatever i have done, as a matter of fact achieved, has been purely out of hard work and mostly due to my never give-up attitude. There were people around and have helped me out with something or the other. But the major chunk of the effort had to come from myself.
I should say i have been pretty lucky to have the support of some of the key people in my life – most notably my mom, my sisters and my childhood friend. Even when i had some initial doubts about my own ability, their constant support and the belief in myself, helped me come out of those questionable time.
Apart from that, my interest in studies once again has picked. If time permits and i make good money, i am seriously considering doing another masters. I have not decided on what, but i would like to go back to studying. I am thinking of learning a course in Food/Nutrition. Only time will tell.
I also realized i am getting old, considering the intense pressure that i am being subjected to by the same people mentioned above to get married. For a long time, i have been very successful in giving some excuse or the other, but now that mom is also back from the surgery, the pressure has been doubled and it is becoming intense as days proceed. Not that i do not want to get married, but i just feel there are couple of other things that i need to do before i settle down.
Oh yeah, i am seriously considering/thinking about getting a new tattoo – #6 
Just have to finalize it and get myself to the tattoo parlour to get it done.
to be continued…
A big welcome back to good ol’ me . Last post was almost 3 months ago (just a day before my birthday) and it took “the blogger formerly known as sansmerci” to make me realize its been a long time since i posted anything here.
It’s been an amazing 3 months of sorts. One of my dreams came true (finally). I quit my job and started my own company. Since then it’s been a wonderful time – learning a lot, finding out a lot and most of all, free to do what i want to do.
While it had been that for me personally, there was this pressure from work and trying to please people who just did not understand how things worked. Not to blame them, but then that’s something i cannot stand. Forcing me to do things against my principles and getting blamed for someone’s else mistake was a bit too much to take for me. The last company i was working for, well, less said the better about them. I learnt how not to run a company there. Driven by greed for money, every action and every little thing was for money and money only.
Tried to hold as far as possible, eventually we both just couldn’t co-exist. With people bitching about one another, constantly trying to bring the other person down, all it took was a short meeting to decide my priorities and i was out on April 6th.
And i glad to be out of it. I have been doing a lot of things, meeting a lot of great people, writing new poems and ofcourse enjoying life since then.
But sadly, i also came face to face with a reality i cannot ignore… I am getting old 
More in the next post in a couple of days 
It’s been a long time since i wrote here something proper and meaningful.
Except for the occasional “i am alive” kind of messages, i have’nt actually written anything worthwhile in the last six months.
Without delving into the reasons for the low level of activity, what is now important is the way forward.
The future holds a lot of promise and definitely has a lot in store for me – both personally and professionally. Things that I thought were going to happen have not. Things that I did not think would happen have.
Spring is seen as a time of growth, renewal, of new life (both plant and animal) being born. The term is also used more generally as a metaphor for the start of better times.
Well, that’s right. Only a couple of days before a dream becomes a reality. How i set to go about living in that dream is a different question but everything happens one at a time.
It is a mistake to try to look too far ahead. The chain of destiny can only be grasped one link at a time.
It’s that time when things are discussed, settled and finalized over a cuppa. Since Jan ’09, the thought has been slowly creeping in my mind and in the last few days the same has been bolstered by the happenings at work and the ever growing frustration that seem to have attached itself to it.
I have been giving a serious thought to a whole lot of things and at the current scenario, it’s just a matter of weeks before the inevitable happens.
So, until such time my posts will be a lot more sporadic while i am officially on a coffee break!
Btw, i will be attending Search Camp – the biggest search marketing conference in india scheduled to take place on 28th February & 1st March 2009.
If you are going to be there, buzz me and we can catch up!
image courtesy: stock.xchng
What an amazing start to 2009. Everything was going well, when out of the blue my sites stopped responding on Jan 3rd. What happened afterwards was utter chaos, madness and tension at the highest level. Traffic to my sites surged and my dedicated server was not prepared for such a surge. The host came up a lot of reasons, but after 9 days i had enough of them.
Yep, all my sites were down for over 9 days. Eventually i decided enough is enough, can’t have more downtime and risk losing everything i had built up over the last few months, so ditched them and moved to a better host and a better server.
I guess in more than one way, this signifies the start of something new. Stuff that i had been pushing away are slowly coming to the surface, with a little help from close friends. Things that should have happened much earlier are finally(hopefully) seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. While it is exciting to be on the verge of a new journey, it sure is confusing and weighs me down with a lot of a pressure, responsibilites and questions for which i have no answers.
But, only when i embark on that i will find the answers and this time i am more than prepared to face it and i am pretty confident it will work out perfectly fine!
Hope is like a road in the country; there was never a road, but when many people walk on it, the road comes into existence. – Lin Yutang
